Saturday, 29 December 2012

Week 178: Last place.

If you keep running towards something that's actually worthwhile, whilst only focusing on your goal. Eventually you'll trip up, run out of breath or just collapse on route. You'll end up in final place and everyone will overtake you. This has happened to me throughout my life time when focusing on my ambitions. I've stayed up nights thinking about what I will become, and the questions that plague my thoughts are pretty much never ending. Do I take risks or do I just carry on with what I'm good at? Do I give up a substantial income for something that will provide me with a greater future? I've normally kept quiet about what I'm good at. I'm not a master of everything and I know that. Everyone has their talents in their own ways and I'm completely aware of this. I've been keeping my work covert until I'm actually ready to show off, until it's actually at a point where I'd be satisfied to risk my reputation.

This may sound like gibberish but if you think about it from a third person point of view it makes complete sense. Stand back from your aspirations for just 5 seconds. Tear your perspective away and view it from a distance. The connection between you and your goal is elasticated, sometimes it stretches  and the route becomes longer however sometimes it will ping back into place and you will be left stood right beside your goal. However, you never know when it could stretch away again.

So I've decided I'm prepared for the New Year. I'm prepared for the consequences of me taking this next step. I may have to hide my ambitions, put some stuff on a temporary hold and just focus all my energy on making something work. I will never forget my original goals. They stay true to me and I will sustain my journey towards them as I handle something different.


There's only one way to go when you're feeling ambitious and that is towards what your instincts are telling you. Just keep going, if you trip then get back up again. If you collapse then just gather your thoughts, think, drink some water, take a breather, figure out what's the best tactic to carry on and do just that; carry on. 

Most things do happen for a reason. Not in a spiritual kind of way, but in a sequence of events kind of way. You just need to be aware of consequences and also be aware of your initial choices that caused the outcome. 

Last place isn't always bad! As long as you make it to your goal, then nobody else matters and it doesn't matter what place you came.

I hope you all had a great Christmas and a Happy New Year too.

Song listening to right now: Subterranean Homesick Blue - Bob Dylan

Sunday, 23 December 2012

Week 177: Christmas 2012.

This year I haven't really focused on Christmas. There has been so much going on. Tomorrow is my last day at my workplace in London and I'm a little bit nervous. I'm taking a big risk and a huge jump towards this commitment in the new year. I'll be back home in Reading with my family in a days time and I really can't express how much I miss them. I will announce in my next post what this new venture is, and if you are interested please keep reading.


This is a slightly different portrait to a set I have posted before. It has a different feel to it yet it is the same subject matter. I'll try not to bore you with any symbolism but I do feel it is relevant to me moving on to something new. Looking back at the past so that I can head towards a different future. This picture means a lot to me and I was very close to just leaving it stuffed away in a corner somewhere. However, here it is.

Song listening to right now: Bricks and Mortar - Cancer Bats

Monday, 17 December 2012

Week 176: One extreme to the next.

This will be another short one, because I am pretty busy making some huge changes in my life at the moment. I'm about to make a jump from one career to the next. I know what is best for me, I'll see it through and have no regrets. The greatest emotion I have ever felt is the feeling of being in the right place at the right time and if I do not commit myself to this change then I will not know that feeling for a long time.


This photo is about two and a half years old now. Time flies and it reminds me of having a laugh with some of my closest friends. I had a good three years at university when I look back at them. I learned a lot about myself. It was the biggest life lesson I've ever had and probably ever will. It was my commitment to my work that kept me in check. However, being in the right place and the right time at the end of it all, was the ultimate changing point. Things can go from one extreme to the next in a very short amount of time but if you are prepared for this to happen, then you can utilize it. 

Song listening to right now: Fever Dream - Bury Your Dead

Saturday, 8 December 2012

Week 175: I will never.

I will never stop trying to help people who deserve it. No matter what it takes, I know where I have gone wrong in my past and where I have failed at realising who deserves to have happiness.


You may not think there is much to this picture of New York, it's out of focus, it has terrible lighting and really bad composition. However, it reminds me of doing things for people who deserve it. There is a lot behind this that takes me back to a time where I would think outwards, constantly. There are certain people who entered my life in the past that I cannot forget.

Song listening to right now: A Toast To The Future Kids - Emarosa